THe Newsmaker Pool
Politics + Betting = strangely, somehow not a crime
The Newsmaker Pool started in the mid-90s with a handful of people drafting politicians, celebrities and other notables and sending them to an administrator via carrier pigeon.
Now, after fifteen years of the site being dark, we are preparing to re-launch the contest in January 2025 with all of the technological advantages that the ensuing years have given us.
Just kidding, it’ll still probably be as poorly constructed as the old excel-sheet/bulletin board offerings that were offered in the early 2000s.
A brief history of the newsmaker pool
where we’ve been
Here is a brief timeline chronicling the development of the Newsmaker Pool:
Pool 1: Started over e-mail amongst a handful of friends. Confusion over rules leads to legendary amount of cheating and inter-contestant threats.
Pool 2: “Trading” of newsmakers introduced. Rules muddied even more, so that in final week, three teams merge to attempt to displace pool leader.
Pool 3: No significant changes. Threats of violence now escalate to include late-night phone calls to pool administrator.
Pool 4: The Newsmaker Pool goes on the World Wide Web. Rampant confusion as increasingly non-sensical rules and bizarre electronic forms cause several people to stop speaking to pool administrator for a number of weeks. First prizes awarded as part of the pool include one of those “Dogs playing cards” pictures.
Pool 5: “Trading” of newsmakers disallowed. However, several players attempt to “gift” newsmakers to one another. The Newsmaker Chronicle makes its debut, informing all contestants of the latest attempts at cheating.
Pool 6: A new pool database is introduced, allowing players to change their teams at any time, and to draft new newsmakers weekly. Pool rules become long and utterly indecipherable. Contestants now number over 85, and are found throughout Canada, the US, France, the UK, Japan and South Africa.
Pool 7: The Newsmaker Pool moves to the Natishco domain name, which provides for a much higher throughput and more bandwidth-sucking graphics. Nearly one hundred pool contestants compete in several regional sub-pools. The pool administrator throws a shrimp ring into the woods at the pool party. The sixth seal of the apocalypse is broken.
Pool 8: Slight database alterations including cookies to remember logins (ahhh, remeber Kenny Loggins?). Contestants reach a high of 121. At the pool party, a pinata is smashed with a mop.
Pool 9: Participants number over 150. The winner of the pool receives a copy of the classic 1985 Kick Axe album “In the Club”. Secondary prizes include hand-pressed Natishco t-shirts.
Pool 10: Now over 175 contestants, the Newsmaker Pool crosses the inter-species threshold as two cats win. The prize of an inflatable green chair is destroyed in minutes.
Pool 11: Disaster strikes as after a decade of gambling on it, the Globe and Mail discovers the contest and sends a reporter to interview the pool administrator, who promptly grabs his go-bag and ignites several oil drums that surround the Natishco servers.
Secret Pools 12 and 13: Behind a security firewall, with a small but still sizeable contingent of participants, the Newsmaker Pool introduces its futures market contest, and issues stocks based on electoral outcomes, including several prop bets.
